tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post5146028896583359128..comments2014-05-13T19:20:24.552-06:00Comments on Heart to Heart Adoptions: Birthfather Laws Explained by Donna, Director of Heart to HeartHeart to Hearthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13202953262461268183noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-79291922810047518652010-10-03T00:57:42.544-06:002010-10-03T00:57:42.544-06:00ABSOLUTLY.. these women are amazingly strong and c...ABSOLUTLY.. these women are amazingly strong and caring, and if it were not for them.. we would not have these precious children in our arms!! They are making the hardest decision of their lives in giving their child up for adoption. Imagine how hard that must be!! I think Utah's laws should stay as they are but, the national registry needs to be set up. Lets face it.. if there were a national registry how many BF's would really come forward and take responsibilty for their child?? Sadly, probably not many..We Are The Davis'shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06767551667136370711noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-71512561743592584022010-10-01T09:32:55.733-06:002010-10-01T09:32:55.733-06:00I agree with Utah's Birthfathers laws. I don&...I agree with Utah's Birthfathers laws. I don't know how Utah is "stealing" or "kidnapping" children as many people say it does. Utah does not force women to come there to give birth to their children and then "kidnap" or "steal" the child. The law is looking out for the BEST interest of the CHILD. Why is that wrong? As this post said above that if the birthfather was involved and committed to the birthmother than the birthmother would not find herself in the situation to make the choice of adoption. These birthmothers are amazingly strong women who have to make an choice that is total SELFLESS. She is thinking of what is best for her child. Where is the birthfather at this time? Is he being as SELFLESS? Now there are those RARE situations the birthfathers want to be involved but aren't BUT the cold hard truth is that the majority of birthfathers don't want to be involved or don't care to be involved. In those RARE situations the best interest of the CHILD should be looked at. Not the interest of the adopted family or the interest of the birthfather but the interest of the CHILD. This law does that!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-7053742020503434012010-09-30T16:28:42.242-06:002010-09-30T16:28:42.242-06:00So much of it has to do with intent. It is genera...So much of it has to do with intent. It is generally not the intent of birth mothers to hide the pregnancy as it is have the freedom to make a decision and follow through with it. It is certainly not the intent of Utah to "kidnap" children, but to try and act in the best interest of the child. Do birth fathers have the same intent?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-51186595232002306002010-09-30T14:20:11.824-06:002010-09-30T14:20:11.824-06:00I read the article Susie posted and find it very d...I read the article Susie posted and find it very disheartening that "out of state" fathers are not given more of an opportunity to make a choice for themselves. I TOTALLY agree that there should be a National Putative Father's registry set in place. That would make it more fair for them to know what they need to do, regardless of what state the baby is born in. It's a hard situation, BM are doing what they feel is right for their babies in the sense that they want to avoid a life of fighting over the child. They want a stable environment for them and so they choose adoption. And while I think Utah may be a bit too strict on the law for out of state father's, I agree with the "put you're money where you're mouth is" thought. If they want to care for their baby I feel they SHOULD be made to lay out a clear plan, rather than just say they will and, drop the mother and child later on.We Are The Davis'shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06767551667136370711noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-6484407991080351962010-09-29T21:51:20.133-06:002010-09-29T21:51:20.133-06:00You mention that the birth mother came to Utah to ...You mention that the birth mother came to Utah to give birth. I have read she gave birth in Virginia. Can you clarify?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-33514109489356384922010-09-29T16:57:36.935-06:002010-09-29T16:57:36.935-06:00Utah does everything possible to steal babies away...Utah does everything possible to steal babies away from their biological fathers. They help the mothers hide their pregnancy from the fathers. They allow women to come from outside the state to give birth, therefor making it easier to take the baby away from the father. <br /><br />This article by the Salt Lake City News is very telling about the difficulty Utah puts on fathers:<br /><br />http://www.cityweekly.net/utah/article-11795-some-call-it-kidnapping.htmlSusiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15929169562563801608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3362905730371708237.post-30233585158386105432010-09-29T16:25:55.404-06:002010-09-29T16:25:55.404-06:00We have adopted twice now and in both situations t...We have adopted twice now and in both situations the birth fathers were "absent". My daughter's BF had known about her and abandoned the whole sitation, he came back about a year later and was un-aware that she had been placed. But, after 5 years he has still never made any attemtp to gain rights. My son, was born in Utah and his BF is here as well. He was un-disclosed to us, we have no idea what the situtaion was and if he even knew about him. So, being here in Utah, if he knew, he should have been aware of the laws and what he needed to do. For me, this is a huge fear of mine. Wondering if he had no idea of the pregnancy.. would he find out and decide to fight for parental rights? I think the law is very clear on what needs to be done and is more than fair to give a BF time to accept responsibility for the child. I guess in an out of state situation, it would be different, they are not aware of the Utah laws. But, I don't think it's fair to let them come back months later and fight for parental rights. Somehow those kinds of situations need to be adressed, so they better understand how Utah law works and what rights they do or don't have right from the beginning. In our situation, if my sons's BF were to come forward and say he did not know about the pregnancy.. would he have grounds to fight for custody? I think as adotpive parents this is all of our worst nightmare, to think of a BF coming back and wanting the child. As you said before, in the "best interest" of the child isn't always the way it works out. Which is VERY unfortunate.. the child's well being should always be number one priority!We Are The Davis'shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06767551667136370711noreply@blogger.com